Sometimes Life is sooo Unfair... Life has been throwing lots of curve-balls at me lately. I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months in late October because it just wasn't working and I had figured out that there were feelings I had for someone else who has been a major part in my life for a long time now and stupidly told the boyfriend. He and I parted ways easily and are still friends. However now 6 months have gone by and I just told this guy how I feel about him last week. We have been good friends since elementary school and denied that we felt anything for the other for years. Each of us had intentions on asking the other out at one point or another and it just never seemed to happen. Now he is in the military and going off to Afghanistan so yet again nothing will happen even though we are being honest with each other finally. It really stinks. I mean I understand that he wants to be completely unattached when he leaves and I totally support that decision but at the same time I want to be selfish and say that it's not just you that has ties in this. I told him that I would support him no matter what he did regarding the army but I did not realize how badly my heart would end up hurting in the process. I am so badly wanting to share my faith with him right now and teach him all I know about the Good News but lately I don't know now nor know when to do so. I tried one night and he just brushed over it another he told me he would probably never believe. I know that I cannot hold myself accountable for him being a non-believer but it is so hard not to because I have been in his life for so long and he still doesn't believe. I am trying to give it up to God and just let go putting my faith and trust in him but it is so hard to do so and oftentimes it all becomes more of a hassle than it is worth so I try even harder to allow God to take control and that is when I truly become upset and frustrated when life is not going my way. I have yet to figure out how I can witness to him in a way that he won't realize what I am saying and trying to do until after he has started to believe what I am saying. I am struggling to find the words to say as well as the strength to say maybe it's not his time and let it go. I mean the guy is going to war... he doesn't know the true glory of God and he is going to war. If something were to happen to him, I don't think I could live with myself, when I know I could have told him at any point in the last 8 years.
On a brighter note...I am now 20 years old and have evaded teen pregnancy!
God be with you this day and always and bless you with wonderful things!
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